how not to start a phone conversation, mom edition
mom: Regan…[sobbing]…it’s…[sobbing]…I can’t get the words out…it’s about your father…[15 seconds of sobbing and silence]…
me: WHAT IS GOING ON??? WHAT IS IT??? WHAT IS HAPPENING??? I’M PUTTING ON MY SHOES NOW!!!!
mom: no, no, no…he’s alright. Let me back up.
Well, he does have the flu from hell and he hasn’t kept down ice chips or 2oz of gatorade in the past 48 and he’ll most likely be admitted to some hospital in the morning to rehydrate, so he’s not alright…but christ, woman. I suppose this is some sort of exposure therapy for my great fear of my father passing early, but I don’t think I like it.
on post-modern feminism
Is my making fun of most shit* on Pinterest a way of shitting on women much like women calling women “whores” and stuff is a way of shitting on women? But seriously, where’s the taste**?
*strangers’ shit, not my peoples’ shit
**I ask while sitting on my weathered, $30 velvet love-seat.
pardon me, Netflix
but how the hell did you confuse me with someone who wouldn’t be interested in watching a documentary about a circus? HOW?
D.A.R.E.
Kids, dope is whack. Suppose someday you smoke dope and giant thunderstorms with funnel clouds and siren-inducing powers show up at 3am. You sure would be sorry.
Looking for Non-Cheesy Fitness/Healthy Food Blogs.
Suggestions?
I like BenDoesLife because he is from one town away from me and regularly visits Northampton. Kinda cheesy, though. FitTogetherNow posts pictures! So many pictures!
“Willow” and “Aspen” wedding gowns from Jenny Packham
The Dress of The Week Jenny Packham Bridal 2012 - Belle the Magazine
the one on the left, please.
(via nogreatillusion)
Ahem.
I’m currently applying to a MSW program, one avenue in becoming a counselor/therapist/bad ass. Since mental health issues have played a major part in my life for the past fifteen years, I felt that this would be a fitting vocational path to explore. At the very least, a more fulfilling path than the current one of assisting rich people in spending their disposable income (other than the rich people who go to a therapist simply for the narcissistic thrill). So wish me luck and don’t bring this up again if I fail and never get into a program.
The end.
checklists
checked!
- completed online application
- paid my dues
- mailed transcript request to Smith registrar
- mailed academic reference forms to Pierce Hall
- mailed professional reference forms to Boston
to-do
- edit first two essays
- write third essay
- drop-off professional reference forms in St. Louis
- mail complete paper application
I can see the light, y’all!
(I realize that this isn’t all very difficult, it’s just that I fret and have been fretting a lot since December. If only I worked as hard as I worried, I’d be done by now.)
I can’t stop giggling. Sigh. God bless Pinterest. Oh, and bless that stripper baby, too, while you’re at it.
“Belle”
Beauty and the Beast’s Belle has a condescending song to share with the world! Performed by Stone Cold Fox at Maude Night at UCB on May 16, 2011.
Starring D’Arcy Carden, Brandon Scott Jones, Molly Lloyd, John Murray, Nate Smith, Fran Gillespie and Johnathan Fernandez
Written by Leila Cohan-Miccio
Directed by Neil Casey
I paid $13.50 to see Beauty and the Beast 3D tonight.I couldn’t get any of this out of my head! Also, the memory of my two older brothers fucking up my 9th birthday cake by cutting up the beast whilst screaming “KILL THE BEAST on the lovely screen-printed Beauty and the Beast sheet cake that my mother’s friend bought me.
on grad school apps
Two references in the bag, just need to email my academic reference (like yesterday) and get everyone packets in the mail.
1.5 of 3 essays down.
General application complete.
Need to get Smith to mail them my shizz.
30 days to complete.
DO IT!
thoughts on a saturday
- I don’t laugh at The Three Stooges
- Baths are boring.
- When I become a therapist I want to start a softball team called the Shrinky-Dinks
- I’m pooped.
- I want 1/3 of these dresses for my future (very far future) wedding.
Sequins galore, shine on.
Image Via: This Is Glamorous
Pleeeeeease don’t let it stop! and please someone gift me that blue number on the far left.
